Introduction: Why I Created This Blog and What Comes Next

The above lyrics are taken from a song I love by Michael Jackson entitled Music and Me. They perfectly and succinctly convey the way that I feel about music. The entire song does, actually, which is how the name of this blog and my upcoming book came about. There are some songs that just seem as if they were written for me, or feel so perfectly tailored to me that it seems as if the songwriters could have been in my head with complete access to my private thoughts while composing them. Music and Me is one of those songs, and it is one of a few reasons why I ultimately decided to share my point of view in this way. I also just come alive when I hear good music. It stirs something up inside of me that I have a hard time articulating properly. I cry or laugh, or scream or dance; it just depends. I get completely lost in music.

I was born on December 19, 1986. Rarely am I so transparent about that these days, because the older I’ve gotten, the less I’ve been inclined to tell my age. No, not because of the cliché about being ashamed of aging as a woman, but because of the inclination of some people, albeit harmlessly, to automatically label individuals of a certain age as a “baby” or a “youngin’”. This often comes into play for me when music is being discussed. I have always enjoyed music that is my age or older, so when I mention my love for some random old song or artist sometimes, I may jokingly get a variation of the following in response: “Whatchu know ‘bout that? You were a baby when that came out!” or “That was way before your time!” I know it’s harmless though, and it usually leads into a great conversation about great music.

Funnily enough, though I may be still considered a “youngin’”, I was born during a decade that I would come to love and cherish so much mainly for its music; a lot of my favorite ‘80s music was either released before I was born or when I was still too young to fully appreciate the experience of their releases firsthand. A prime example of this is a song by The System entitled “Don’t Disturb This Groove”; I was an infant when it was released so I obviously couldn’t appreciate the subject matter of it at the time. Sometimes I half-seriously curse my age because it is the reason why I have never seen some of my favorite artists perform live in their prime [hello, Michael Jackson’s Bad Tour], or never got to dance to some of my choice tunes during a time that those tunes were still fresh and new to the world. I even imagine that in another time and space, I was able to do that, which is why I am so connected to it all. Ironically, a song released during one of these music eras that I love so much, Teena Marie’s “Déjà Vu (I’ve Been Here Before)”, touches on this type of fantastical phenomenon, and I feel such a deep connection to that song.

I grew up the youngest child in a family that consisted of several music aficionados, mainly the head of the household, my father. He influenced me in so many ways, but he probably didn’t even realize the impact that his music taste and appreciation had on me throughout my life. Some of my earliest memories of anything, for instance, involve me listening to his vinyl single of Ray Charles’ “Night Time is the Right Time” (and being confused by the realization that it wasn’t actually sung by the Huxtables of The Cosby Show), or my sisters and me playing Janet Jackson’s “Rhythm Nation” for him so he could hear the sample of Sly & The Family Stone’s “Thank You (Falettinme Be Mice Elf Agin)” in it. We knew he would like the song on the strength of that sample alone. I can’t even pinpoint when I first became of aware of the greatness that is Sly & The Family Stone, but I, along with my sisters, obviously knew from a very young age that my dad loved a lot of their music, and the memory of recognizing the significance of that sample is very clear.

In addition to Sly & The Family Stone and Ray Charles, my father liked Louis Prima and classic jazz artists like Sarah Vaughan, Ella Fitzgerald, Duke Ellington, and Count Basie. He didn’t play them much by the time I came along, but he would mention them and reference them from time to time. I remember him being pleasantly surprised when I started to get into those artists myself. He also always loved traditional gospel acts such as Slim and the Supreme Angels, The Canton Spirituals, Willie Banks, Willie Neal Johnson and the Gospel Keynotes, and The Pilgrim Jubilees (which was probably his all-time favorite gospel group). In recent years, I learned that the lead singer of the latter group is the father of Miki Howard. I was amazed that I had grown up hearing both singers without knowing that connection, but I digress. He also hosted his own gospel music radio show every Sunday morning entitled Spiritual Inspirations for 40 years beginning in 1976 – 10 years before I was born. At 80 years old, he was still getting up to host that show; he truly loved it and it brought him a great deal of joy. Back to Louis Prima though, a song by him that he really loved and that will always remind me of him is “Banana Split For My Baby”. If I had to name one song that I identify with my father, it would be that one. I heard that song being sung by him on what seems like a daily basis growing up. While he was walking into the house: “Banana split for my baby…” While he’s washing dishes: “…A measly cold glass of water for me.” Those Louis Prima scats soon follow. That record is still at my parents’ house today. I remember once when I was in college, the song popped into my head one day so I decided to look it up on YouTube. There I found a live performance of Louis Prima himself singing the song that I’d never seen before. During these college years, I’d become really interested in jazz and big band music myself, and I am sure that these memories of my father were the foundation of that.

These memories may seem small and I am certain that there are people all over the world with similar ones. For me though, they are more than just minute, arbitrary recollections. They are what make me who I am. I truly believe that if I had grown up any differently, I wouldn’t love, appreciate, cherish, and critique music as much as I do. I used to think that everyone felt the way I do about music. In more recent years, thanks to social media platforms and online message boards, I have been able to more clearly recognize that mine is more than a casual appreciation of music. When I was jokingly called a music nerd by a family member a few years ago, I laughed it off. However, it ultimately made me realize that my relationship with music is unique, and all of the aforementioned factors contributed to its formation.

My book of the same name as this blog is coming soon, and it is a product of my relationship with music. My hope is that it will clearly convey all the ways that it has helped shaped the person that I am today. At the very least, my story will also help those who know me to understand me a little better, and inspire and inform those who do not. Or maybe, it will even make others consider their own relationship with music. These things – the blog and the coming book – all make up “music and me”.

Author’s Note: I started writing my book in the summer of 2014 and initially started working on creating a blog in the spring of 2015. This introduction is actually taken from the book. It has taken literally years for me to even get to this point. I experienced a lot during the years that my book was being written, including my father’s passing, which would in turn delay my completion of it because I constantly felt the need to add and edit. I wanted to make sure I included that tidbit to make clear the effort, thought, tears, work, and care that has gone into this. I hope that this blog will touch you in some way, and that it will pique your interest in my coming book. Whew! I know that was a lot – I can go on and on about any subject that I’m passionate about, and music is high on that list. Thank you for reading, and welcome to Music & Me!